Wednesday, February 6, 2013

The 'hood

So some sarcastic dude went ahead and put together a Judgmental Map of Denver. If you want the full story click on the image of the map below and it will take you to a Westword write up on it. Anyone who knows me knows that I love myself some judgmental and un-politically correct generalizations (I'm sorry, they are funny).  For all the Denverites, enjoy.

So let's see where the McG's live and where they are going (yes I'm talking in the 3rd person)....

Well, we are currently in City Park West which happens to be sort of sandwiched in between "tattoos", "young active hobos" and "foodies." Since we are sans tattoos and have a home, I guess we're foodies? Um, ok. I do in fact love food, oh, and I often grocery shop at the not-so-lovely "UnSafeway" also featured on the map. If only we were a few blocks further north we could be gangsters.

Now when we started our house search the neighborhood that I was campaigning to be in (Park Hill, just east of our current place) is marked as "Wealthy Drive-By's"  (clearly I'm not that, as John refused to drop that much money on a 2 bedroom bungalow). And I often found myself driving through "people's bosses" and "almost rich" looking for houses thinking "damn it, why am I not rich?"

So where will be going? Well folks, just look where it says "Gay-pleton." That's right, Gaypleton! Well sorta. We are actually going to be right where it says "Yuppies" and "All the babies in Denver" (I'm pretty sure our house is being built where the "i" of the word "in" is). Considering we both graduated from Miami University (aka J.Crew U), appreciate a good Polo shirt, and have a baby, we might fit this stereotype. I just threw up, and had an awful self realization. I'm going to bag up all my polo's for Goodwill next weekend.

Ok, on the plus side at least we are on the "gay" side of Stapleton and not the "stab" side.... safety first, and my gay friends have better taste than most so I'll take that as a compliment. I'm pretty sure this also means well manicured yards, and "welcome muffins" from the new neighbors. Bring it on!




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